The LOOK

One of my friends is a tall 1st generation woman of Caribbean decent. She is sassy, smart, respectful, and works hard. But people give her THE LOOK.

Yes, THE LOOK! Who wants to see it? No one wants to see it directed at them! I’d rather not see it from anyone, at all! You know the one, the up-down ‘I don’t like you, even though I don’t know you. I don’t want to know you’. The casual one people throw at people.

My friend was visiting me today, and we were unloading her car because we’d gone shopping together. An older woman was walking by. She gave her THE LOOK. She turned from her rude up-down look, and smiled at me, “Hello.”

Excuse me, you?! I actually had to pause, and ask my friend if I’d really seen, what I just saw. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I stood there stunned. She calmly agreed that I’d seen what I’d seen. At this point, the lady was half way down the street, and I say lucky for both her and I. I have things to point out when people are rude, let alone to my family and friends. And in my own neighborhood?!

Then I stopped.
I thought about it.

My friend’s skin is black, and my skin is white. I know there really people who act so drastically different because of it, but this was a startling look into people’s biased hatreds. Here we were in the light of day, in a diverse, well-off, safe area, and she was receiving THE LOOK. As affronted as I felt on her behalf both in the moment and following- she was calm. She has this happen to her all the time. That bothers me, and it probably bothers you too!

I was raised in a family that values people regardless of ethnicity, color of their skin, accent, sexual orientation, and etc. I was raised that people are people. People should be considered based on their actions and words, NOT on the color of their skin. People should be respected. But the LOOK is really just one piece of the problem that is racism. So how can we contribute to a societal fix of such an encompassing problem?

Education, time, and showing people through example that people are equal. These are brief versions of social fixes, but to truly fix such issues would take an effort from many societal fronts.

There’s no easy solution, but I’m SUPREMELY INTERESTED in hearing suggestions and/or solutions to this. Or instances in which you’ve encountered the LOOK. Please, be thoughtful and respectful, and share what you have to say on issues like this!